Thursday, September 3, 2009

Snowing in September

So I looked out the window yesterday morning, and there's snow on the ground. No. Really. In Memphis, in the summer.

Here's a picture of it. It's all white and stuff.


Ok, so it wasn't all OVER the ground. And it wasn't snow. But it was white.


So, the next think I think is, "Who fed the Webkins to the dog!?" Not that I'm very unhappy about losing one of the ever-present, pesky underfoot stuffed animals coupled with their Crack-addictive website.

Except for the fact that the happy little cuddy creatures are not cheap, and if one is killed, it somehow always gets replaced by at least two more.

And this, of course, is why we have almost a hundred of the crazy little stuffed animals underfoot. No, that's not an exaggeration. Ok, well, maybe it is, but not much of one.

Just, my youngest daughter has enough that when she was forced to sleep downstairs overnight when my oldest daughter had one of her college buddies over to spend the night, she surrounded the couch with THREE half-circles of webkin guards to protect her through the night.

Not that they do much good as guards. Even the Ninja Webkins are polite. The extent of their protective methods would be to launch a mexican jumping bean at you and say "With my bean and my sombrero, my candy is never far away!"

Or possibly, just sit idly by and watch as your house gets robbed, and say, "Atomicolicious!"

Can you tell we have a heavy dose of Webkins addicts in the house? If you are just confused by those statements above, then good. You've managed to avoid the addiction. But if a webkin makes it into your home, don't say I didn't warn you.

Anyway, back to the snow. So, it wasn't really snow, and it wasn't really the guts and entrails of a dismembered Webkin suffering a tragic but not undeserved end.

So what was it? Well, to answer that question, you'd have to take a look at the culprit...

Her name is Maya. She's a bi-eyed half husky, half sneaky little neighbor dog. We're guessing Golden Lab.





If you're wondering what bi-eyed means, check out this picture of her...
Isn't she beautiful? One blue eye, one brown eye; This is her serious look. No, really. She's being quite serious right now... Huskies are serious dogs. Especially when you ask them if they want to go outside and run.





And like all Huskies, she decided that September had started (has something to do with that internal doggy clock. So she picked that day to 'BLOW COAT'.

Now for those of you NOT in the know about this particular habit, let's just say that on two given days out of the year (and you never know when it will be, because the dog always waits until you forget about it) the dog sticks its paw in its mouth, and explodes. Literally.


Pieces everywhere. Don't believe me? Just look at this. No, LOOK AT THIS!



This is a piece of my dog on the lawn. No, I'm sure it's not just hair. There's too much of it. It's a chunk of dog.



Now, after the initial explosion, there are tremors and aftershocks, and the family always takes a hand in assisting in pulling off chunks of dog. See my family. They have all come outside to help. See them helping?





Ok, so they aren't helping. Not much. But momma is about to come outside and assist Maya in her explosion.







Here's a picture of Momma carefully combing chunks of dog off our dog...











Here's a piece of dog on the comb...




And here's the piece slowly floating away... It has it's own shadow. It also has its own gravity well, but that's beside the point. Look at the shadow!! That's a substantial shadow for a chunk of hair.





So, after the ritual disintegration of the dog is over, she has this great big grin on her face. You tell me why, when she's lost half her hair just as Fall is getting started...



Seriously, though, Maya is a snow dog. She's designed to grow a winter coat about now, and the summer coat (which apparently is a bit thick for Memphis summers) has to 'blow away'.

All I've got to say is, 'Better out than in.' We sweep up enough hair to make our OWN dog on the inside of the house, and you just saw how much hair was on the OUTSIDE of the house.

So, what do you do with all that hair in the back yard? Use it to stuff a few Webkins, make some use out of all that stuffing??

Well, my youngest daughter said we should leave it out there so the birds can have something to line their nests.

That's all well and good, but it's fall, and the birds aren't going to be making anymore nests around here.

7 comments:

  1. That is a lot of dog chunks to blow off one dog! and look, she isn't nekkid or anything after!! Remind me never to get a husky-neighbor dog mix, okay? LOL!!!

    Fun post!

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  2. Beautiful dog! But... what's a Webkin?

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  3. Check out http://www.webkinz.com

    Cracker barrel and many other stores sell these cuddly stuffed animals. They come with a small card that contains a code. You navigate to that website and create an account, using the code you add your stuffed animal.

    The code tells them what model stuffed animal, and you give it a name - they already have a cute cartoon picture of it.

    Then your online animal has to go to the vet and get checked out, and you play games for Kinz Cash, with which you buy them a house, extra rooms, furniture, food, TVs (no I'm not kidding, your Webkin can WATCH TV online, one of several short animated clips.

    There are hundreds of games and jobs your Webkin can do, and each earns KinzCash. It's like stuffed animal crack. It's addictive as anything.

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  4. oohhh, do you knit/crochet? dog hair actually makes some wonderful yarn.

    (I had someone on ETSY spin up some of my cats' collected sheddings -year round daily event of the brushing of the cats- into yarn and made myself a scarflett. Yes I'm nuts.)

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  5. Most people would have told this story in one sentence. You managed to turn a rather mundane occurrence into an epic adventure--a gripping who-done-it! You forced me to read this to see what happened and the telling was amusing enough that I enjoyed the shanghaiing. It's easy to make a great story out of an extraordinary occurrence. To make a great story out of something ordinary--THAT takes talent.

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  6. Hey, my friend Nancy referred me to your site....we are fellow ADHDers here, too. In Kansas, in August and September, we have white cottonwood "snow" covering lawns. Rather pretty, except for the allergy problems, LOL!

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  7. Hello, Heidi! and welcome!

    thanks Jeanette. It's fun writing about the shenanigans my family gets itself into (and out of). Glad you enjoyed it.

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